The Soul Hub discuss the importance of loving yourself first before you love someone else. As well as self-love tips including retreats for the soul and cold water therapy.
Will Smith said it best “her happiness is not my responsibility. She should be happy and I should be happy individually. Then we come together and share our happiness. Giving someone a responsibility to make you happy when you can't do it for yourself is selfish”
Often, we hear the term, searching for “our other half” or introducing our partners as “our better half”. These terms tend to suggest that without our partners we are somehow incomplete, unable to be whole in ourselves as individuals. This of course leaves us open to an unhealthy dependence on our relationship for our self-esteem.
By showing up complete and with a healthy dose of self-love to our partners or potential partners, we allow them to also show up as themselves completely. Not as a reflection of what we need, or are missing in ourselves. Statistically, this has been shown to create happier and longer-lasting relationships.
Not only are we more likely to attract a better-quality relationship, but also engage in healthier behaviours once in a relationship together. Not feeling the need to cling to our partners for our own selfish needs, or push them away when we fear they are in danger of not being met.
Instead, we show up as the best version of ourselves. Healed, healthy and whole. Not looking for a counsellor, parent, or crutch in our significant other. Instead, a team-mate, to learn and grow together with and experience the joys of life together as two complete individuals.
High levels of self-love and self-esteem have also been shown to shield us against the devastation often felt should we need to be separated from our partners for any reason. Whilst still being an extremely difficult experience to overcome, having security in the fact that you were a functioning and complete individual before any relationship, and will continue to be afterwards, allows us to speed up the healing process. We move on to healthier coping mechanisms, and rather than jumping into another relationship to feel “complete” once again, we are content in ourselves to enjoy life until the right person may or may not come along again. Either way, we won’t miss out on life in the meantime.
Take the time to find yourself, be your own “other half” and then find someone to share that miracle with. You won’t regret it.
But, how we can start?
1. Promote positive thoughts. Anything that will make you smile.
2. Fill your body with food and drink that nourishes it and makes it thrive.
3. Learn to love the skin you’re in. You can’t hate your way into loving yourself.
4. Surround yourself with people who love and encourage you.
5. Stop the comparisons. There is no one on this planet like you, so you cannot fairly compare yourself to someone else.
6. Celebrate your wins no matter how big or small.
7. Step outside of your comfort zone and try something new. It’s incredible the feeling we get when we realise we have achieved something we didn’t know or think we could do before. Why not try gifting yourself with retreats for the soul, or by trying cold water therapy?
8. Take time out to calm your mind every day. Breathe in and out, clear your mind of your thoughts and just be.
9. Follow your passion. You know that thing that gets you so excited but scares you at the same time?
10. Be patient but persistent.
11. Commit to mood-boosting and healthy daily routines like ice baths!
Why does Cold Water Therapy Promote Self-Love?
If there’s one habit that’ll promote your happiness, it’s cold water therapy. Ice baths have many incredible benefits for your health and mental strength. In fact, the mental strength benefits are a primary reason why many take daily cold-water plunges.
Ice Bath Benefits
Daily cold-water plunges have an abundance of benefits. It improves your self-discipline, metabolic efficiency, regulates your hormones, reduces inflammation as well as a general release of endorphins and endocannabinoids (feel-good hormones!) in response to the cold. In fact, the increase of mood-boosting hormones and neurotransmitters that comes from daily cold water plunges can improve symptoms of depression and anxiety by changing the chemistry in our body and brain!
Struggling to start? Our starter kit includes our guide and Facebook group access to help you begin your cold-water journey with the support of The Soul Hub and our growing cold water community.
Self-love is ever-evolving. It’s something that needs to be practised daily but can take a lifetime to master. So be kind and support yourself through the hard times.
"I am enough. I have enough. I do enough."